New Music Friday - 03/10/2025

Albums/EPs:

• Kali Uchis - Sincerely: P.S. 
• Kyra Machida - Blonde
• Taylor Swift - The Life of a Showgirl

Singles:

• Asha Banks - Mascara Tears
• Ashnikko - Wet Like (feat. COBRAH)
• BENEE - Underwater
• Cat & Calmell - Hotness!!!
• Danny L Harle & Caroline Polachek - Azimuth  
• Ella Eyre - hell yeah
• Empress Of - Blasting Through the Speakers
• Lauren Spencer Smith - Thick Skin
• Leah Kate - Not To Be Dramatic
• Leah Kate - Alice In Fuck Boy Land
• Louis Tomlinson - Lemonade

Kali Uchis - Sincerly: PS:

Cry about it! (with Ravyn Leane): This was a pleasant listen. Don't really have much more to say than that. Nice, chill listen, both artists worked well. 6/10

Whispers of the Wind...: Pretty good and chill song yet again. It's a pleasant listen. Not totally feeling some of the high pitched vocals but eh. 6/10

Pretty Promises (with Mariah the Scientist): This one feels a bit more off sadly. Not really feeling this. The production is just a bit more off. The feature is fine, but yeah. 5/10

Cherry On Top: This one seems better. More boppy. I liked it a decent amount, though it's not my favourite. 6/10

All of the Good: Again, nice good ending track. I did enjoy it more. It was just a good, nice listen! 7/10

Overall Verdict: Overall, just more pleasant songs. It's a nice extension of the original album and I feel about how I felt with the original album. Nice to listen to, but it's not really music for *me*. Don't regret having listened to it though. 

Kyra Machida - Blonde:

Blonde: Okay, this could be a project that I like. Maybe. It does have a bit of cunty electronic production. I thought it started a bit mediocre but it got better. Pretty standard of the genre but good! 7/10

Kinda Girl: This one is not quite as good. Still decent. But I think it lacks that critical oomph. 6/10

Handsy: Again, decent, fairly boppy, but it's not quite there. 6/10

Nasty: Maybe this is what I need? Eh, it's pretty same as the ones before, it's boppy, it has good energy to it, sung in the cunty type of way, but yeah, not quite there. 6/10

TMI: Pretty similar. Decent but not really that special. 6/10

Voicemail: Almost feels a bit like Wii music in parts. Not derogatory. The chorus is fairly good here. I think this is a better song, and it's more catchy and fun. 7/10

DNA: Not the chants. Stop it. I hate it. Bad. The rest of the song is kinda alright but yikes. The song is not it. 4/10

Overall Verdict: Mostly, this was a decent listen. It's a nice entry into the canon of cunty pop projects, but it's not quite on the level of some of the others. It does it decently, but it's not that special, and could be a fair bit better. There were a couple of good songs that show that vision, but also one terrible song that I will look past. Decent project, but I need more in future. 

Taylor Swift - The Life of a Showgirl:

The Fate of Ophelia: When the production really kicks in, it gives a fun I Can See You type vibe. It works very well. Chorus works very well, it's catchy. It's a very fun song all the way through. Bridge doesn't quite cut it but we can look past that. 8/10

Elizabeth Taylor: It starts a bit slow, but the vocals do work well in that part. Again, when the full production comes in, it's such a SEXY bop. It's dark and sexy. And I do love it. I could genuinely have it on repeat. 8/10

Opalite: Another boppy song. It's a great start. It makes you want to dance. I don't quite enjoy it as much as the previous 2 songs, it has a bit more of an annoying streak to it. Maybe it's the instruments and the way the vocals are with the effects? Not totally sure. Anyway, still good. Last chorus seems quite catchy especially. 7/10

Father Figure: It's just a bit more boring honestly. It's alright but it screams background music to me. Just soft and pleasant but that's it. There's something about the vocals in the chorus that are a bit annoying too. The dick bigger lyric...terrible. I don't care if it's intentional. I shouldn't be taken out of a song like that. End is a bit meh too. 6/10

Eldest Daughter: Comments, hot takes...these lyrics...no. Absolutely not. Some of the lyrics are just so clunky. The bad bitch and "this isn't savage" lyric is a crime against humanity. This is the most garbage Track 5 she's ever released. On first listen, I LAUGHED out loud. It's supposed to be an emotional song! I shouldn't be laughing at how stupid it is! The lyrics are the main crime here, the production is serviceable. The bridge isn't anything special either. Stupid song. Unrelease it. "It's an intentional play on Track 5's"...I don't care. It's still BAD. 4/10

Ruin The Friendship: Just a bit boring. It's again akin to background music. Nothing stands out about it whatsoever. Like, good production or good anything, it needs SOMETHING. 5/10

Actually Romantic: It's time for the Charli XCX dig song. Can't wait. If you're going to make a song like this, make it interesting. Maybe play on Charli's production? It's mostly boring, which is probably the worst crime. Have to give it a bit of credit, it's at least a somewhat decent listen for a lot of the production. And it falls into the same "haha I'm totally not bothered XD HAHA" songs that Taylor has often made. Like, we've all been there, saying we don't care when we really do, but PLEASE. Lyrically, it's just a bit pathetic overall. 5/10

Wi$h Li$t: Fat ass lyric...kill me now. Some of the high pitched singing is a bit grating. Production is decent though. Pleasant production, pleasant listen. Not that much to it beyond that. Sometimes it does feel like Taylor is trying to stuff too many words into a sentence. Also cringe lyrics ("fucking lit"). It may be intentional, it still takes me out of the song. It just doesn't work for me. Not sure how I feel about the "wows" either. Bridge is boring. 6/10

Wood: DICKS HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. It's trying to be funny and a fun song and it just fails at that. The "knock on wood" is stupid. CupcakKe would be crying. Try listening to "One Of My Bedbugs Ate My Pussy" to understand how to actually do this kind of music. Also, "New Heights, manhood" is pathetic yet again. The kinda redeeming factor is the production is somewhat interesting and a bit boppy, but it's not quite there for me to like the song. "The key that opened my thighs"...no. Moving on. 5/10

CANCELLED!: Now I can already tell this one will be dumb based on the title. "Girlboss too close to the sun"...YIKES. The chorus is actually fairly decent. The production carries it, it has some of the dark pop boppy vibes that some of the early songs had. Bridge is again a bit boring. The chorus carries the song (even with the STUPID lyric message overall), but it's not enough to salvage the rest of the song and make me like it more. 6/10

Honey: Ended Troye Sivan. Just joking, that's impossible. Silly piano time. The beat just doesn't work with it. Some of the way this is sung...meh. Bridges all seem to be quite bland. I think this song suffers from trying to cram too many words in yet again. Like, you don't need as many! I guess it sounds decent enough overall, kinda? I think? May need more time with this song. 6/10

The Life of a Showgirl (feat. Sabrina Carpenter): ZZZZ. "Legitly". Shut up. This is just as boring as Sabrina Carpenter's songs. Like putting them together? ZZZ. It really does sound like the songs on Sabrina's albums I just found a snoozefest. At least it actually fits the Showgirl theme. Boring though! Sabrina added very little in my opinion, but I'm not a fan of her anyway, so. 5/10

Overall Verdict: This album was a disappointment. I wouldn't call it bad, far from it. It's decent enough. But I expected a lot better. I expected from a Max Martin and Shellback project I'd love it instantly. That just isn't the case. The first three songs highlight what a fantastic album this could have been if that energy was maintained. Sadly, it was not. A lot of the rest of the songs were quite bland, even if they were pleasant listening. Too many lyrics were stupid and took me out of songs. I didn't really see the Showgirl theme implemented well at all. So, all in all, while this album was not BAD, and it has some very good songs, it was a big disappointment. 

Singles:

Asha Banks - Mascara Tears: This was a pretty nice sad song. It had good vocals to it, decent production. I enjoyed it. Good piano. 7/10

Ashnikko - Wet Like (feat. COBRAH): This is such a good song and exactly what I expected a collab between these two artists to sound like. A super cunty bop. Stunning stuff! 9/10

BENEE - Underwater: My favourite place to be. This song is...alright? I think. Some of the vocals annoy me a bit but I enjoy the production of it. Cool sounds at the end! 6/10

Cat & Calmell - Hotness!!!: This better be a hot song. I mean, it was fine? Nothing really that special. Not quite what I expected with the title but it was fine. 6/10

Danny L Harle & Caroline Polachek - Azimuth: Okay miss gaggy bop? Was not expecting this sound. Danny never fails either. Caroline and her stunning vocals really works with a bop like this. 8/10

Ella Eyre - hell yeah: Am I feeling the vocals here? Kinda. Kinda not. It's boppy and fun. Good song overall. 7/10

Empress Of - Blasting Through the Speakers: I wasn't totally feeling the vocal effects but honestly, it's a bop. Not quite sure it blasts through the speakers still though. 7/10

Lauren Spencer Smith - Thick Skin: This was a BOPPP. I like the vocals. Chorus is really fun too. Enjoyable! 8/10

Leah Kate - Not To Be Dramatic: Not the Airplane mode lyric. I suppose it's not the worst offering "Leah Kate" has offered. But nor is it good. It's bad. But less bad than some of her other songs! We take the wins where we can. 4/10

Leah Kate - Alice In Fuck Boy Land: Hated that start. What is it about Leah Kate that makes me passionately hate her music? Oh my god, atrocious thing to be a hook of the song. The production is not the worst ever but still annoying in parts. Bad! 4/10

Louis Tomlinson - Lemonade: Not the chants. Stop it. Okay weird production. And now it's a bop. This seems like a fairly good song honestly. I enjoyed it! 7/10